Responsibilities

It has been a while since i put thought to blog, one could make various excuses, unwell ( i had flu), nothing to stimulate the mind to write, or too much to stimulate... whatever the reason, i haven't had the need or desire to put my thoughts here for a little while. i have guilt over that, maybe that's silly, but i made a commitment to keep and maintain my blog and in not doing so, i have sort of let myself down a bit.
So, here i am to rectify that, the problem is that altho i have some thoughts that i could put into words, they are not ones that inspire me or that have fired me up to the point of needing to make them permanent... other than a thought i had yesterday following the reading of a community board where i saw a post regarding the idea that maybe sub/slaves should look at the responsibilities that being a sub puts on the Master's.

Now this is something that i had not ever really thought about or even considered.

How heavy does that weigh on MG... that responsibility to take the lead and make choices/decisions, not just for himself but for me also.
i find it easy to "pass the buck", its what i need to do, as decision making is not a part of who i feel i am, i hate having to decide, to choose... that is why i give that right over to MG but in doing so i must put pressure on him all the time with even the simplest decision he makes on my behalf. For example, what do i wear, what time do i go to bed, silly mundane incidentals but still decisions that i give MG the right to make. But hey, those lil things he does not decide each and every day, ultimately yes, he "could" decide but i would estimate that it is only on the odd occasion that those examples are actually taken up by him, nevertheless, he still has the ultimate power to decide if he so wishes on any given day. His choice whether to or not but even that is a choice he has to make, another decision on his part.
Lets take something of greater significance, something larger, that has more impact, more bearing on me that he might make a choice on. Example, Have i done something outside my remit that he has to decide whether i have overstep my bounds and if so, what course of punishment/discipline he might consider needs to be taken. The need to correct in itself is a big step for one person to have to take over another, even if that right has been given in submission to ones Master, and having made his choice he then has to follow that through to its conclusion, another demand made on him. Its all a bit one sided in the choices stakes i am thinking and must weigh heavily on any Dominant.
Fine you might say, that is the choice taken when one enters the lifestyle as we have. We have made that choice together, knew what we were both taking on and as such we shall both see to it that we maintain that but still, having thought about this a little i have had my eyes opened to the pressure that my submission places on MG.

Not as if he doesn't have enough on his plate, i go and add more and more to his already heavy burden just by being myself, by being who i am, by being his slave.
Of course, there is the other end of the spectrum, the up side to the down, the giving back or i hope there is in that i try my very best to be all things to MG that he requires me to be. i try to do what he needs, to see to it that he is happy and fulfilled in his Dominance, to see that his needs, whatever they may be are satisfied. My way of given back to him. i hope it balances out, MG says it does, that in his Dominance over me he gains what he needs, the power, the control, the ability to take charge of any situation which is his natural way.

We have descussed how things might be different if we were not Master and slave, would life as we know it be that altered and to be honest, on a day to day basis, we don't think it would, if M/s stopped here and now, would we act any different toward one another.... and here is the crunch folks, the answer is no, we would be just the same because it is who we are, He is and will always be a Dominant force, i will always be the submissive one... because it is what our individual natures demand of us. We cannot change that. Had we never heard of D/s, had we never found that there was such a thing, we would still be who we are and would probably live exactly the way we do now, under the same guidelines as we do now because He is who he is and i am who i am. Putting a name to it doesn't alter anything, all it does is give us a way to explain how we have chosen to live our lives and allows us to perhaps take it a little further on occasions when the mood takes us.

It has been said many times before that if people were to look at the way their Grandparents lived their lives back in the 20/30's the possibility of seeing a D/s relationship at its best would be highly probable. Many people in that era lived as we live, the man of the house taken charge, being the head of the family, the wife, without even knowing it, being submissive to him. It was how they lived, was accepted as the norm. Domestic discipline was also quite normal and no one batted an eyelid when Man of the house would spank his wife for some misdemeanour. It was the way it was. The man had ultimate control over the wife and the household, he made rules she was to abide by and expected those rules to be followed. He had control over finances, made all the decisions regarding the family affairs and the wife would follow his lead without so much as a question asked. i guess that is how MG and i live also.
So maybe we live a life that is from past times to some degree and if that's the case, i am happy to acknowledge that because those days, that way of life, seems to me to be a lot better than the ones many people have now.

It will never be a perfect world, but i have no complaints!!